There’s a unique kind of weight that many of us carry—an unspoken inheritance, passed down through generations. For those of us who are the descendants of immigrants, especially from colonized nations, this weight often comes in the form of inherited inferiority. It’s subtle yet pervasive, showing up in the way we move through the world, in the quiet hesitations before we speak, in the choices we make to feel safe, accepted, and seen.
I grew up deeply connected to my mother’s family, who immigrated from the Philippines to the United States. My grandparents spoke fluent English. My grandfather served in the Navy. They were smart, resourceful, and resilient. And yet, I witnessed the ways the world made them feel different. I watched as they were treated like outsiders because of their heavy accents. But it wasn’t just the accents—it was what lay beneath them.
It was the inferiority I saw seep through our family. The hesitations. The quiet shrinking. The learned belief that to survive meant to comply.
Of course, they felt like minorities. The Philippines had been colonized over and over again, leaving behind generations of people conditioned to believe that power, intelligence, and beauty belonged to the oppressor. That kind of imprint doesn’t just fade when you step onto new land. It lingers. It informs how you navigate the world. And when my family came to the U.S., that inherited inferiority didn’t disappear—it just took new forms, manifesting in patterns like:
Agreeing with the status quo as a survival mechanism.
Compensating with material possessions in order to belong.
Cowering to the majority in hopes of being "protected."
Distancing ourselves from anything that could jeopardize our belonging.
And let’s be honest—these aren’t just ‘bad habits’ that need fixing. These are survival strategies, ones that kept our ancestors alive. But for those of us here now, those of us who are safe, those of us who have the privilege to question and reclaim—our work is different. We get to heal. We get to choose something else.
How to Heal Inherited Inferiority
1. Recognize the Pattern
Healing begins with seeing. Noticing. Not just on an intellectual level, but deep in the body. How does inherited inferiority show up in your life? Do you shrink in certain spaces? Do you over-explain? Do you hold back from speaking up? Do you feel like you have to prove your worth constantly?
Take inventory. Not with judgment, but with curiosity. You cannot heal what you do not see.
2. Reclaim Your Narrative
Colonization and systemic oppression have dictated what is considered ‘worthy’ for generations. But we are the ones who get to reclaim the truth.
Learn your history. Speak your family’s language. Eat your ancestral foods. Reconnect with the wisdom that was stolen, erased, or made to feel ‘less than.’ There is so much power in remembering.
Because the truth is, our ancestors were never inferior. They were brilliant. Strategic. Survivors in the truest sense. And we are their legacy.
3. Speak, Even When Your Voice Shakes
Inferiority thrives in silence. The more we shrink, the more we reinforce the idea that we are meant to stay small. But that’s a lie.
Start speaking. Start advocating. Start taking up space. Not because you need to prove anything, but because your existence is inherently worthy. Even when it’s uncomfortable. Even when your voice shakes. Even when it feels like you’re rewriting centuries of conditioning—because you are.
4. Heal the Nervous System
This kind of conditioning doesn’t just live in the mind—it lives in the body. It’s in the way our nervous systems react to perceived threats, in the way we carry tension, in the way we default to fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.
Healing inherited inferiority isn’t just about mindset work. It’s about the body.
Breathwork. Meditation. Movement. Nervous system regulation. Practices that help us create safety from within, so that we can show up fully in the world without defaulting to old survival patterns.
5. Surround Yourself with Empowered Voices
We become what we surround ourselves with. If you’ve grown up in spaces where inferiority was normalized, start seeking out new voices. Read books by people who share your background and have reclaimed their power. Listen to speakers who remind you of what’s possible. Find mentors, friends, and communities who lift you up.
Your environment matters. Choose one that affirms your worth.
6. Honor Your Ancestors Through Courageous Acts of Love
Healing isn’t just about us—it’s about the generations before and after us. Every time we choose love over fear, authenticity over assimilation, and power over passivity, we continue their legacy in the most radical way possible.
Our ancestors sacrificed so much so that we could have opportunities they never did. That doesn’t mean we have to carry their struggles—it means we get to evolve beyond them. And that is an honor, not a burden.
Gratitude for Our Ancestors
To my grandparents, to all the immigrants who left everything they knew for a better life—thank you. Thank you for your sacrifices, your resilience, your willingness to start over in a world that often made you feel unwelcome. Because of you, I have the opportunity to see these patterns, to unlearn, and to heal.
Your strength runs through my blood. And I promise to carry it forward—not through struggle, but through love. Through courage. Through standing fully in my worth.
To those of us carrying the weight of inherited inferiority: we are the generation that gets to set it down. And in doing so, we honor those who came before us in the most powerful way possible—by stepping into the fullness of who we are, without apology.
Because we were never meant to stay small. We were always meant to shine.
